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sirenspull_ooc2012-10-25 01:15 am
thepull_mods) wrote in sirenspull_ooc2012-10-25 01:15 am
Hillsdale Halloween Prank Candy
Hilldale University's fall fraternity pledge class, well known for their creative prank candies, are at it again this year! They've ditched their plague doctor outfits worn in years past, and are distributing FREE candies at high traffic public locations island wide between now and October 31st. All dressed like PSY, their distribution tables are all playing THIS.
A sample lineup of their horrific goodies this season:
Caramel Worms These aren't real, but they'll start to squirm once they hit your tongue! A chemical reaction produces wiggle motion upon contact with saliva.
Honey-Filled Straws Seems pretty basic and harmless, but... hey, what's that buzzing sound in your ear? Also, your sweet-scented breath will release powerful pheromones. Effects last half an hour after consumption.
Chocolate Balls delicious melt-away swiss chocolate dipped around a thin, pillowy center that delivers a satisfyingly delicate crunch. Which is to say, this is a freshly dipped egg sac, which delivers a payload mouthful of tiny, live baby spiders.
Cherry Cordials An annual favorite, their warm, gooey red center tastes less like cherries and more like a splash of artificial blood-flavored filling. The Sanguinarian Society is sure to be up in arms about this one well within 24 hours, so it'll be disappearing from candy stocks quickly!
Puke Brittle English Toffee and Nut Clusters which have the appearance as well as the scent of a puddle of vomit, but don't let the nasty scent deceive you- these are possibly the most delicious offering to be had this year. The boys are extra-proud of this one, given their intimate knowledge of barf odors in the frathouse, but they'll only serve it to you off the sidewalk. 5 second rule!
Crispy Fudge The 'crisps' in this candy contain tiny white pellets, which aren't digestible, but surprisingly easy to swallow. They also slowly absorb liquid and expand to about a quarter-inch in the digestive tract, so by the time you're ready to take an extremely uncomfortable bowel movement... be prepared for their maggot-like appearance throughout your poop.
Taffy Balloons They're packaged to look like condoms, and blow up to about the same shape and size. Inflatable AND Edible, the PSY-guys'll gladly fill them with helium for you to swallow, inducing light-headedness and that silly side-effect of a squeaky voice. The chewy, rubbery balloons are fruit flavored, and after eating them you may having a little trouble keeping your feet on the ground. Induces hovering about six inches off the ground, lasts about 10 minutes.
Acid Drops Super sour sucker candies that turn your saliva into a sizzling corrosive upon contact with the air. Burn holes in the grass with your spitting contests!
Shocktarts These are slightly milder sour-sweet sugar tablets. But they do make your tongue feel numb, and carry just enough electrical charge to pass along a nasty static zap to the next person that you touch.
Molasses Chews Feeling a little sluggish? You might need a pick-me-up or a nap after braving this one. This square chew is a mild but long lasting sedative and muscle relaxant, as well as neutralizes all caffeine intake for the next twelve hours. No coffee will help you here!
A sample lineup of their horrific goodies this season:
Caramel Worms These aren't real, but they'll start to squirm once they hit your tongue! A chemical reaction produces wiggle motion upon contact with saliva.
Honey-Filled Straws Seems pretty basic and harmless, but... hey, what's that buzzing sound in your ear? Also, your sweet-scented breath will release powerful pheromones. Effects last half an hour after consumption.
Chocolate Balls delicious melt-away swiss chocolate dipped around a thin, pillowy center that delivers a satisfyingly delicate crunch. Which is to say, this is a freshly dipped egg sac, which delivers a payload mouthful of tiny, live baby spiders.
Cherry Cordials An annual favorite, their warm, gooey red center tastes less like cherries and more like a splash of artificial blood-flavored filling. The Sanguinarian Society is sure to be up in arms about this one well within 24 hours, so it'll be disappearing from candy stocks quickly!
Puke Brittle English Toffee and Nut Clusters which have the appearance as well as the scent of a puddle of vomit, but don't let the nasty scent deceive you- these are possibly the most delicious offering to be had this year. The boys are extra-proud of this one, given their intimate knowledge of barf odors in the frathouse, but they'll only serve it to you off the sidewalk. 5 second rule!
Crispy Fudge The 'crisps' in this candy contain tiny white pellets, which aren't digestible, but surprisingly easy to swallow. They also slowly absorb liquid and expand to about a quarter-inch in the digestive tract, so by the time you're ready to take an extremely uncomfortable bowel movement... be prepared for their maggot-like appearance throughout your poop.
Taffy Balloons They're packaged to look like condoms, and blow up to about the same shape and size. Inflatable AND Edible, the PSY-guys'll gladly fill them with helium for you to swallow, inducing light-headedness and that silly side-effect of a squeaky voice. The chewy, rubbery balloons are fruit flavored, and after eating them you may having a little trouble keeping your feet on the ground. Induces hovering about six inches off the ground, lasts about 10 minutes.
Acid Drops Super sour sucker candies that turn your saliva into a sizzling corrosive upon contact with the air. Burn holes in the grass with your spitting contests!
Shocktarts These are slightly milder sour-sweet sugar tablets. But they do make your tongue feel numb, and carry just enough electrical charge to pass along a nasty static zap to the next person that you touch.
Molasses Chews Feeling a little sluggish? You might need a pick-me-up or a nap after braving this one. This square chew is a mild but long lasting sedative and muscle relaxant, as well as neutralizes all caffeine intake for the next twelve hours. No coffee will help you here!
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NOW YOU CAN BE A HUMAN TASER
/crying
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